Tuesday, February 6, 2018
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Do Your Husband Deserve Respect?
Marriage is a God-ordained relationship between a man and woman that have taken sacred vows to love and honor one another. God is to be the center of that marriage.
I have been married for almost twenty-two years now, to the same man. There were times that on purpose I disrepected my husband because I felt he deserved it. Now I have God's enlightenment and a pure heart to honor God by honoring and respecting my husband.
The difficulties began when early in the marriage I experienced verbal abuse and degrading in the home and publicly. I became unforgiving and unloving. My heart was bitter for several years to the point of despising and hating my spouse.
The deceitful thing about this is that I was Spirit filled and despised my husband. The characteristics of an unloving spirit can operate in an individual unknowingly to that person. That is because the scripture says, if you hate anyone you walk in darkness and don't know where you are going. So, spiritual blindness plays its hand.
Until I begin to surrender my heart and my marriage to God totally, nothing changed. The fights were weekly.
When we were newly married, my husband had a car accident and I was on my way to work and saw him on the side of the road with the policeman. Someone had ran into the back of his car, I glanced at him and said, he had an accident and kept on driving to work.
Now a wife that has the love of God flowing in her heart would have stopped simply out of respect for her husband. But I didn't because I really didn't care.
Thank God, my heart is no longer in that bitter condition as it was years ago. I can truly say that I love and respect my husband today. It came through humble submission to God; through many afflictions, trials and difficulties. God has done a glorious work in my heart.
My marriage begin to change when the Spirit of God begin to prompt me to make a change in my own life. I surrended to the Holy Spirit. I meditated on scriptures found in I Corinthians 13,
the love scriptures; love is patient, love is kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude.
Let's talk about some of the things that are root causes of disrespect in the marriage:
- bitterness/hatred/unforgiving spirit/malice
- pride
- contentious disposition/strife
- jealousy/envy
- greed
- discontentment
- slanderous/degrading words
- control
When we belittle our spouse in the home and publicly we are crushing his spirit. It makes it difficult for him to show love to you as a spouse. He will stonewall, get very quiet and no longer want to communicate with you. The other extreme is an outburst of rage and anger.
Proverbs 31:26 says, "When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instruction with kindness."
31:11 - Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him
good, not harm, all the days of her life.
Your words have the power to cause your husband to truly love you or dread being near you.
Death and life is in the power of the tongue, speak life over your husband today.
Let him know in ways that are meaningful to him that you honor and respect him.
Ask him today in what ways does he expect you to respect him.
Let me hear from you today!
